What really happened
by garnetcloak
Summary: What I picture Dorothy was doing during most of the R*D episode. Careful, may contain some spoilers. its's my first big-o fic. Rodger/Dorothy fans be happy. it's not really mushy or angsty.
1. I am lost

What really happened  
  
  
  
Forward: I do not own Big-O or any of its characters. They all belong to their respected owner and creator. I take no claim to these what so ever.  
  
  
  
"The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple." –Oscar Wilde  
  
  
  
I feel something inside me. I feel a memory. A barcode, children, red. Where do these come from? Why do I feel them? I wish to seek the answers to these questions, but I fear Roger will become enraged. Perhaps he is having the same emotions. I do not know, and I will not ask. I do not wish to anger him. It is almost time for my daily ritual. I decide to let him rest this morning and instead go to help Norman.  
  
"Norman." I say coldly.  
  
"Miss Dorothy, has master Roger awakened yet?" Norman replies.  
  
"I did not wish to disturb his slumber in the usual pattern." I reply even colder. Norman looks surprised. I do not ask Norman my question yet. I must first put him at ease by helping him with the breakfast. I need to know what these memories are. I fear that I will never know. Then again, who am I to speak? I should not be "feeling" things, but I want to feel, so I do not tell them. I wish to, but I will not. I begin to scramble the eggs, thinking about whether I may be partially human or whether I am merely a machine, of steel. Humans are imperfect, but machines are meant to be efficicient. However, machines frequently break down as well, insufficient and imperfect.  
  
"Miss Dorothy!" Norman exclaims. I look at the eggs. They are on fire. I am imperfect as well. What does that prove though? Does it prove I am human or does it prove I am merely machine and failing to function properly? I can not decide, it is too early. Norman puts out the flames and begins to make new eggs.  
  
"Miss Dorothy, is there something bothering you?" Norman asks.  
  
"Norman, Where is there access to historical records in this household?" I reply, intent upon finding my answers.  
  
"Near the repair station in the basement." Norman replies. I ponder what I will look for in my search to find my answers, because I know Roger can not answer them, and I do not wish to bother Norman. So I hurry and I ponder. My emotions take control of me. I have to get control of myself. I pause for a moment to relax. I slowly walk. I hear footsteps coming down the hallway. I immediately know them to be none other than the footsteps of Roger. I run down the hallway to escape Roger. I do not wish to see him now. I hurry to the basement. I am becoming frantic. I trip, and my vision becomes static. Mechanical static. What is to become of me? Will anyone ever notice I have feelings too? I black out and my circuits short. 


	2. Within my emotions

"It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything."-Unknown  
  
  
  
Chapter 2  
  
  
  
I look around. My vision comes back and my cooling system comes on. I am still where I was when I blacked out. I head back down the stairs. My emotions will not take over me like that again. I will not allow it. I hurry to the computer. I am quite tired. I move my hand over the touch- tone pad. It does not turn on. I look at my hand. I do not have fingerprints, so the computer does not recognize me as human. I become angered. I quickly turn to other ways of turning it on. I quickly try the retina identity system. It does not work. It can not see my retina because I do not have one. I become angered again. If only this idiotic computer had emotions as I do. I quickly try the password. A few things pass through my mind. I hate mornings? That is too easy. Big-O? No too obvious. It couldn't be Dorothy, could it? I don't even try that; I could not take the pain. I try subway. Doesn't work. I try police force. Not that either. Now I try Mother. It works and I am allowed passage. I think for a moment about a strange choice of password. He must not have known his mother. I pity him in a strange way. I realize that Norman must not even know his own children. A strange feeling envelops me. I know not what it is. I realize what I must look for. Although I already know who he was and what he did, I need to know more.  
  
My creator.  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Big-O or any of its components or characters. I in no way take credit for them. 


	3. I am found

"Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it." –Helen Keller  
  
Chapter 3  
  
  
  
I must find the answers to my questions by searching for others created by my creator or where my blueprints had gone. I search a record of my past. I am dumbfounded. My past is a blur. I find some disturbing information. I find a record of Paradigm's psychiatric ward. They placed memories into a select number of the children. She checked the list. The last is R.D. What does this stand for? Does it stand for R. Dorothy? Or is it Roger? I cannot decide. I become confused. My emotions take over again, but I do not black out. I regain control. I am lost in my emotions. Perhaps I only know these things because I am around Roger at night. Sometimes I hear his strange howling and come to his aid, in an attempt to drown out the memories. I believe it was him who had the memories. I believe he is the one they belong to. I will still look for my blueprints for the sake of it. I search. They belong to someone. They have used them. There are other copies of me within the world? I am frightened. I suddenly realize the panic signal being sent from Roger. How much time has passed? I watch him from the cameras that Paradigm has placed along the roads. There is another Dorothy. I become stunned. She is holding a gun towards Roger. Fear runs through my wires. I hurriedly hit the send button for Big-O. I jump into the controls. I quickly travel to Roger. I hope that it is not too late. I am out of the ground and now see grey skies around me. I hear a voice below calling up at me.  
  
"Dorothy?! Did you summon Big-O by yourself?" Someone calls. It is Roger. I suddenly feel my cheeks grow red. I did not know that was an ability I had. Roger looks up at me with a puzzle on his face. He is quickly inside the control room with me. I realize I am in a corner. I quickly look around. Roger is at the controls. It is nice to see him there again. I suddenly see his left hand. It's bleeding and loosing control. I slip between him and the controls. I place one arm around behind his chair and the other over his hand at the controls. I fear he is nervous. This is the first time I have felt the need to do this, and I ponder what he will do. I watch the vision screen of Big-O and I see him smiling. It is not a nervous smile, but a sincere one. I feel so much relief inside me. He soon begins to fight, just as I am ending mine.  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Big-O or any of its components or respected characters. I in no way take credit for them.  
  
  
  
Author's Note:  
  
It may be a while before I write another. I'll try to find my inspiration. I don't just want to write a common type of fanfic, I want to write something special so it may take a while 


End file.
